​The idea of marrying someone can be wonderful and sometimes terrifying all at the same time.  One of the things that makes the idea of marriage so terrifying is that many people who are marrying come from parents who divorced, sometimes more than once. Yet we hope and promise ourselves that perhaps divorce will not be part of our history, our story.  How to give your relationship every possible chance for success is the goal of pre-marital counseling.
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Learning how to give yourself and your fiancée the best advantage possible for a long life together with each other is a gift you give yourselves.  What if this is a second or even third marriage?  Pre-marital counseling is even more important.  You understand the heartache and disappointment of divorce – the what-if’s that still may ring in your head. 

Here’s what we know:  All humans do better in securely attached relationships.  When we understand our own and our partner’s strengths and challenge points and work within that framework rather than against it, our relationships are stronger. Whatever we can do to make our relationships stronger, especially as we build a foundation of years together, should be done. 

Dr. Chester is trained to use the Prepare/Enrich assessment tool which helps couples identify their strengths and areas of growth.  Prepare/Enrich is used as a starting point to discuss a variety of issues that can affect marriages.  While Dr. Chester encourages couples to attend pre-marital counseling that may be offered through their place of worship or other organizations, having sessions that are oriented to you and your unique situation in a private comfortable setting may prove particularly valuable.

​Whether you choose to work with Dr. Chester, another Mental Health professional, or attend a weekend program, Dr. Chester strongly encourages you to participate in pre-marital work.  The majority of couples who see her for marital work did not participate in pre-marital counseling or only had 2-3 one-hour sessions with their marriage officiant.  The cost of pre-marital work is far less than a divorce attorney, divorce therapy, and the emotional trauma and physical stress that accompany such relationship changes. Please give yourselves the best opportunity you can for long term marital happiness!